A Long Road Ahead of Us

Yes, it has been nearly 3 months since the last post. A lot has happened, a lot has changed, a lot is yet unknown. H needs a lot (did I say a lot) of attention due to her upbringing. She was doing great at forming an attachment with us, and we were making great strides in a lot of areas. She was usually pretty happy and was a lot of fun to be around most of the time like any nearly 3 year old.

She took a week long trip to meet our families and really liked flying in the big airplanes and flying through the "bumpy clouds." She loved meeting her new extended family and had a great week. She still constantly talks about the airport and the planes and the people she visited.

Then, weekly visitations with her birth family resumed after a two month lapse. Many of her behaviors regressed, many things from her past have surfaced, and the two of us have had to work much harder to try to meet her needs and continue the progress we had been making prior to visitation. The 3 month hiatus from blogging lets you know just how little time and energy is left at the end of the day (or week, or month; you fill it in.) It's all we can do to get dishes done, the house straightened and vacuumed, clothes washed and all of the must do household chores. For example, Steve cut the front yard today for the first time in six weeks (luckily it doesn't grow very much because of all the shade.) Nap time (which is no longer a given) and late nights are when most of this type of activity has to occur.

H has begun pre-school. Her first two days went pretty well. She will be getting some help and training in many of the areas we have been working on. Hopefully receiving the same guidance at school and at home will reinforce the lessons. And, Kathy gets a break! For 2 1/2 hours each morning while H is at school she is a free woman. Too bad it is a lousy time to take a nap.

Much of what has occurred is not that surprising. But, it has been very painful and frustrating to know what a joyous, loving child H can be and see her suffer as scary and sad memories from her past continue to be reawakened each week. The next few months will continue to be tough for her as things progress toward what we pray will be finalization of her adoption. And we will continue to struggle with too little time, too little energy, and too little sleep as we cope with all the paperwork, visits from social workers, court hearings, school meetings, etc., etc. that adopting from the US foster care system entails. However, the future remains clear in our minds each time she lovingly pats us and says "I like my Mommy." and "I like my Daddy." or when she runs to us, yelling "Daddy," or "Mommy" and jumps into our arms. She feels like our little girl now and nothing can happen that will change our minds about that. She is such a sweet, funny little girl! God is bringing us laughter, especially at the times when we need it most.